In my life, I’ve always had pets, and I particularly love dogs. For the last 13 years I had amazing pup, named Logan. A border collie mix who I named after a certain member of the X-Men, he had the flip-up ‘do on the side of his head, just like Wolverine had in the comics. Just about a week or so ago, we had to say goodbye to him.
This had been a fear I had been dealing with for the last two years. He had lost his sight in one of his eyes, and he had been slowing down. But during the last week of his life, he declined more every day. His hips were giving out; after a few days they weren’t working anymore. A few accidents, and then he couldn’t control his bladder anymore. I hated to see him so helpless.
Logan was an incredible dog. He was smart – knew what everything was called. And he was loving. He had his people preferences. My mom and my brother were usually his favorites. But when there was a thunderstorm, he ran to me and hid under my desk because I could make it all better. This was because when he was a puppy, terrified of loud noises, I would spend many July 4ths taking care of him instead of going out. When he got bigger and kept hiding… it often annoyed the fuck out of me. But I miss it now.
He was a big part of my world. And now there’s an empty space in my heart. He helped me get out of bed. He was there for me when my grandpa passed. He’s made my personal and emotional struggles easier to deal with. When I was sad he was there for me to cheer me up with a face full of gentle puppy kisses. Even when we were sitting with him at the vet saying goodbye, he gave me a face full of gentle kisses. Telling me not to cry.
I’ll miss him for a long time. And every memory with him, every single day of life with him is worth all the pain I’ve been going through right now.
So happy to have had him in my life. I love my pup.